distressing day

I had a bit of a distressing day.  I woke up with pain in my chest today, on the left side above my breast.  After I woke up and noticed the pain I relaxed on the couch to see if it would go away.  When it didn't it go away  it started to worry me.  I took a shower hoping that would make me feel better but that didn't help either.
So after making a couple of phone calls I decided to go to the ER.  At this point I don't know if some of my problem was myself being in a panic.  Anyway I go, get admitted, they take me back and start all these tests and monitors on me.  Everything came back ok....EKG, chest x-ray, blood work.  The pain was due to chest wall irrations and stress.  Good thing I wasn't having a heart attack, but I sure felt stupid by the time I got to go home.  I got stuck 3 times for IV, blood draw and the blood pressure cuff  hurt like a son of a bitch.  I finally took it off my arm because I was tired of it pinching my arm. 

As distressing as all that was, while asking 20 questions about your medical history the one ER person says, "would you like to call your husband?"

"No I'm divorced"

"would you like to call your boyfriend?"

"No don't have one of those either"

After that I thinking...... how pathetic I am because I don't have a man in my life, or anyone other than my parents that would worry about me and be upset that I was at the ER.  Well my sons would be but one is in Indianapolis and can't drive, the other is in Lafayette over an hour away.  I wouldn't let them call my parents because I didn't want to upset them if it wasn't anything major. 

So do the hospital staff assume that every women has a husband or boyfriend ?  Or did I look like I needed to have one?  I don't know but I know I don't need a keeper.......I drove myself to the ER for heaven sake.
Anyway as stupid as I felt, I also got to feel like a loner for not having anyone to come sit with me.

Fat or Phat?

I took Uncle Jam home......I was pretty blunt with him, more so than anyone else.  Not that I hide things but I was just flat out blunt.......told him he was going home with me to fuck.......he had to wear a rubber.  Now he was a different one.....the whole situation was kind of odd.  First off he wasn't much of a kisser.  I like to kiss and not all men can kiss or I should kiss good.  I mean Uncle Jam kissed me maybe twice and he wasn't a overly good kisser.  The next thing that was sort of odd was that usually when you hook up with a man they want to start undressing you, at least till they get to see and feel the ta-tas.  With Uncle Jam it was undressed and then in the bed.  I do have to say he was a nice toucher......knew how to touch the right places.  The touch was enough t get me going so what the heck bring it on.  Uncle Jam wasn't overy large in the manhod department, average and I can deal with average.  It's the itty bitty I done with!  Now I have to say this for Uncle Jam the ool was bent, yeah have a curve to it.  When I seen that I thought oh great how's this gonna work out, but I have to admit it turned out pretty good because that curved to hit just in the right spot!!!
When I bring someone home the first time and he can make me cum two times......he did good!!
He must have enjoyed what I had to give also because when he was done he says to me, "you have a fat pussy"  and I'm like excuse me???   I have a what???  He says no that's good.....not fat but "PHAT"  like sweet.  Now I have heard of a lot of things but "PHAT Pussy" is not one of them.  Oh well that's ok but I was glad he enjoyed me as much as i enjoyed him.  Next time I just rather a man say I have a sweet pussy instead of a PHAT pussy.!!!!

mismatched

Friday night....I met up with some friends and we went out for some drinks. You know usually Friday nights at the Ramada is pretty busy, but not this Friday night. Really was down right boring...guess the rain put a damper on things. The friends I was drinking with decided to go to another bar and I just wasn't up for it. First of this place is a little rough, they make crappy drinks, and the state cop are noturious for pulling people over around this area. So I just stay away from there if I have been drinking, which tonight I was feeling no pain. So anyway I leave the Ramada, decide to stop at Gas America for some bottled water and I had to pee. Go to the bathroom to take care of business, wash my hands when the deed is done....look in the mirror at my new haircut which I don't like and low-n-behold I have on mismatched earrings. I don't go out in mismatched earrings...not only are they mismatched, they are two different size hoops, one is silver and one is gold. WTF I did not drink any liquor while getting ready or anytime before getting to the bar. Not only that all the people I know and call friends didn't notice or they didn't tell me. Wonder which one it was. But I need to really stress here I do not go out mismatched in any way shape or form!!!

Uncle Jam

Hey call me crazy but I liked Uncle Jamicia, so I took him home.  Now I definetly have a couple blogs about uncle because I need to spilit it up.  This was interesting and strange for me and really brought some questions up in my mind ofr me and about myself.  This blog I took him home with me.........that was kind of odd in of itself because I didn't go out with the idea of looking for someone.  I actually really like someone else but he won't give me the time of day for the most part that I don't know why I don't just forget him and move on.  I would like to be something with him but not sure what (definitely not a hubby) but friend, friend with benefits.........something.  But big draw back he kind of flirts sometimes, knows me, is nice to me but we can't seem to get past that. I know his best friend but I just don't want to ask a bunch of question and then something bad happens.  I just don't have the courage to be the one to start things becasue the last two times I did that it kind of pretty much back fired on me........so anyway back to uncle jam......I was surprised with myself that I took him home because I had decided I wasn't gonna mess with any men for a while because they just aren't worth the trouble.  I hadn't messed with anyone for several months, that was ok with me since I know how to take care of my own issues. (if you know what I mean)   While talking to Uncle Jam the question always comes up, "where's your man?"   Always answer the same don't have one, don't need one.  Then I tell them right up front I don't have much luck with men they either have little dicks or want to sponge off of me and I don't need that either.  Then the next thing they want to know is what is a little dick??  That's when I get to laugh and I hold up my thumb..........they look at me like are you serious and that I'm joking.  Nope not joking so you see why I'm over it. They always look at me and say all these sweet things, they can't figure out why some man hasn't snatched me up for themself and usually say so.  First off when they are sweet talking me they know I don't believe that crap because I'm not beautiful and usually tell them so.  Beauty is definitely in the eye of the beholder because I don't see it.   So while talking to Uncle Jam I was trying to decide if I wanted to do the jamician mambo with him........finally thought what the hell, haven't had any for quiet a while and I'm not gonna get what I was kind of holding out for so might as well have some action.  So we went home to do the mambo!!!!!

Panty Raid next issue!!

Alright I know this is gonna be stupid and silly but I just have to throw this out there..................you know in panty raid I talked about my dog liking my dirty panties and chewing them up.  The other night I went out for the night........my Thursday at Shouts........usually wear black bra and black panties.  Dressed like I always do at least as far as the underwear part.  I am at Shout for a while.......had a pitcher of long island, it was time for a potty run.  Get to the restroom, pull down my underwear and here again..........WTF........my panties have a hole the size of a fifty cent piece chewed out of the crotch........thank to  my dog.  After I get done thinking that damn dog, I need to not let her anywhere near my dirty clothes it kind of clicks with me why didn't I notice it when I put them on.  Ok I can kind of understand not seeing it when I put them on because I have to hurry putting on my underwear or the dog thinks we are going to play tug-of-war with them.  I'm jamming my feet in the leg holes pulling them up as fast as I can but why don't those outer hoochie lips feel the bare spot.........no breeze blowing thru, no cold spot, no hole-radar, nothing just bam there's the holey panties.   You know you feel it when you touch the hoochie-coochie........you know when someone else touches, you feel it when your panties get wet or damp, even when Aunt Mary visits and you don't have her bed ready.....................so why not a hole.  Now mind you this has happened to me twice, so this is a legit question.   So if you read this you need to let someone chew a hole in you panties and see if you feel it when you put them on..................and let me know!!

Tag Team me????

Last night I was out, having a drink......my basic kick back, have a drink, listen to the music and relaxing.  Like any other time I was at the bar minding my own business this guy came up to me and ask me if I was alone.  Well yes....he knew that because he and another man sat on the other side of the bar from me.....seen me sitting alone.  Turns out the other guy is his uncle.   He ask me if I would come sit with them and talk to them.........sure why not, this could be interesting.  Yes I went over sat between.  They were both originally from Jamicia.  When I first ask the uncle where are you from he says Ohio.  I looked a him funny and said that don't sound like a Ohio accent......he just kind of laughs and says I live in Ohio but grew up and I'm from Jamicia.  Ok that settled we just start the basic shooting the shit stuff.  Of course seems like they all say the same thing about my eyes, my smile and my lips.  Oh but this one says he like my booty!!!!......and I'm like are you kidding me?......not the boobs but the ass.  Hmmmm what's this ones line now.  But while I'm talking to the uncle, nephew on the other side keeps throwing little things out there.  Finally nephew asks me if I have ever been with 2 Jamicians..........hell I never been with one.........then nephew starts telling me the eyes and lips story like most men and that he wants to kiss me.  About this time I'm looking back and forth between the two..........and finally ask them what's the deal you two trying to tag team me or what???  Nephew just gives me a look like huh what are you talking about so I ask Uncle.........he don't know what tag teaming is.  So I enlighten him........now he's pissed because he realizes nephew has been hiting on me from oe side while he's trying to get friendly on the other........and me??? I'm sitting there thinking HELLO!!! do you think I'm stupid!!!   Nw don't get me wrong I would mind trying that sometime but I haven't came across two men that interest me enough to let them have at me both at the same time.  Anyway I give them both a look and uncle starts in on nephew in Jamician (which I don't understand) so I can only assume uncle was telling nephew to back off because next thing I knew nephew was walking away.  I guess they understood I didn't feel like being tag teamed and really didn't appericate being worked by two.  Maybe that is something I need to consider down the road.............

teenager vs adult

I have been thinking for the last several days that I would really like to find someone to be with on a more regular bases. Not necessaily to marry or anything like that but someone to go out with...dinner, movie, shopping,mini roadtrip,fair, festivals,concert or even to hang out with at home to watch movies fix dinner things like that. I don't need or mean for either of us to be up each others butt 24-7. And yes someone to have sex with but I have this war inside of me that I have those moments like when I was a teenager and feel desperate for someone to love me. Like I never will find anyone....the old maid syndrome. I hate that feeling and in my adult mature grown up mind I know that isn't true and even know that the old maid thing is bullshit. Even in all honesty I'm not desparate by any means just in that moment of wishing for someone it kind of kicks in. As a adult I know it is not that big of a deal to be alone because I do have friends but its those time when I want to go to the movies and don't have anyone or things like that when the teenager stuff kicks in. In all I like my space and my time to myself but then do miss the campionship of someone to be there too. Maybe some of it is my own fault....am I too picky? I don't want someone that is going to take advantage of me and yes my kindness....I'm no ones free ride and I don't want a free ride from a man either. Not to mention looks....like I have room to talk but it is what it is....so the question is what do I want and.....be a adult or a teenager?? LoL at least in the feelings department!!