Come here just don't mean what it used to!!!!

Had to be at work this morning, i needed a shower.  Put my puppy...Roxie on her run, opened the sliding glass door a few inches so she could go outside to potty and some resh air.  With the door open she could also come in if she got cold.  I took my shower came out to check on her, she was sitting a couple of feet from her water bowl so I thought she couldn't reach it.  When I looked at her she had that look on her face like  "uh oh I'm in trouble now".  I looked at her and wondered what she had gotten into.  I din't see anything, decided to take her off the leash, put the leash back outside, and close the sliding glass door.  The absolute second I unhooked her from her leash, Rox shot up and out the sliding glass door...at first for a second I was like WTF but then I ran after her yelling for her to come here.  Out in the yard was the mower man on the lawn mower and she being the big (7#) bad ass dog was out there barking and raising hell with the mower guy.  I'm standing at my sliding glass door yelling at her to come here and she don't even turn around to look at me she is gonna get the big bad mower.  Even though I only had a towel wrapped around me, I step out onto my porch in said towels trying to get this crazy bitch dog to come back but she isn't listening.  I come back in and see the blanket on the couch grab it and throw it around my shoulders and out the door I go trying to get my dog........she's still barking and carrying on.  While this is going on the mower guy shuts off the mower and it trying to shoo Roxie back.  With Roxie still not listening to me I go back into the house and grab the flyswater......I call it the smacker.  So back out in the yard I go, towel aound me (hair in a towel) blanket around my shoulders with the smacker to get my crazy dog........once I get closer to her, she thinks I playing and starts running circles around me.  First one direction and then the other....back and forth ......and me yelling at her "you little bitch"  Afterwards in all that twirling back and forth chasing the dog I don't know if the mower guy got a free show of me under the towel and blanket (but thank goodness I shave the cooch!!)  Anyway I chased Rox around for what felt like forever, she decided she was going around the side of the apartment building and I sure as hell wasn't chasing her that way in a towel and a blanket so I stomped back into my apartment to put on some clothes.  Throwing on a pair of sweat pants and a sweatshirt, I went after her again.  In the time I put some clothes on the mower guy got off his mower and she wanted to visit him.......I come out and she's on her back so mower guy can rub her belly.  He grabs her, picks her up as I stomp over to him.....the whole time grumbling that I'm gonna beat her ass.  I looked the mower guy in the eye, pointed my finger at him and said, " you don't say a word about what happened or what you seen.  It didn't happen and you didn't see anything." He said he wouldn't say anything but I'm so pissed  at Roxie that I didn't notice if he was laughing but I'm sure he was on the inside and I know he's gonna tell his buddies about the crazy woman and her dog......and by the way I beat her ass with the smacker all the way back into the apartment!!!!